Christmas Card From A Hooker In Minneapolis by Tom Waits

Hey Charlie I’m pregnant

living on 9th street
right above a dirty bookstore
off Euclid Avenue
I stopped taking dope
and I quit drinking whiskey
my old man plays the trombone
and works out at the track.

He says that he loves me
even though its not his baby
he said that he’ll raise him up
like he would his own son
he gave me a ring
that was worn by his mother
and he takes me out dancin
every saturday night.

Hey Charlie I think about you
everytime I pass a filling station
on account of all the grease
you used to wear in your hair
I still have that record
little anthony & the imperials
but someone stole my record player
how do you like that?

Hey Charlie I almost went crazy
after mario got busted
so I went back to omaha to
live with my folks
everyone I used to know
is either dead or in prison
so I came back in minneapolis
this time I think I’m gonna stay.

Hey Charlie I think I’m happy
for the first time since my accident.
I wish I had all the money
that we used to spend on dope.
I’d buy me a used car lot
and I wouldn’t sell any of em
I’d just drive a different car
every day dependin’ on how
I feel.

Hey Charlie
for christ sake
if you want to know
the truth of it?
I don’t have a husband
he don’t play the trombone

I need to borrow money
to pay this lawyer
and Charlie, hey
I’ll be eligible for parole
come Valentines Day.

-Tom Waits

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